The Classic Bicycle, Pt. 1 & 2

 
Let's face it: Most of us are not bike racers. Sure, we like to go out with our home boys & girls and try to stomp each other's hearts out. Maybe it's to the top of the next rise, the city limit sign or just up to the pace that makes everyone cry "Uncle!" (You called?)

Maybe it's a Walter Mitty self-image or the incessant roar of the invisible crowd that keeps us believing we have some bike racer in us. That's OK, I'm guilty -- I've even been known to throw my hands high crossing an imaginary finish line . . . when no one is looking.

Most of us can't relate to the Spartan existence that dedicated Cat 3 riders live. Training their brains out, traveling too far to races with poor prize lists, making do with bikes and equipment that probably aren't close to top-end. That life requires dedication, devotion and sacrifices that are hard to comprehend.

Here's something to think about:   How can someone on a well-worn bike with heavy wheels and a creaking handlebar seem to ride so effortlessly at 24 mph? If you're on an $8,000, 15-pound Prince with aero wheels and a tongue dragging on the front tire, it's time to remember what Sir Lance once said, "It's not about the bike."

Nope, it really isn't. And no amount of money is going to make you as fast as the roadie who dedicates his or her life to training and racing. It takes "saddle time" and lots of it.

Sure, a light bike with trick wheels will make you faster than you've been, but it won't make you as fast as that Cat 3 down the block. You know, the one who goes training when the weather is crappy and the light is failing.

I have a theory that most of us "overbuy" our equipment because we make good pay and can afford the best stuff out there. If we were to "dumb down," as the Brits say, and use bikes and gear that's more appropriate to how and where we ride, we'd still have a high score on the fun-o-meter.

And we wouldn't have to come up with excuses when that Cat 3 goes storming by on his/her 6-year-old creaking Can-O-Ale.

Think about it. I'll follow this rant next week with a rundown on what I believe is "appropriate technology" for most of us, including Walter Mitty bike racers.

Hey, I'm not hacking on dreaming. I'm just saying we can still love the bike and the incredible enjoyment cycling provides for a lot less dough than we tend to spend. And remember, I own a bike shop.

 
The Classic Bicycle, Pt. 2

 
I know what you're thinking:  This week Uncle Al is gonna tell us we need to be on retro steel bikes with concrete wheels and saddles made of burning spears.

Not so. I may be an old dog, but I have learned new tricks while keeping one thing in mind -- common sense.

Because most of us don't race, common sense tells me we don't need the same bikes that professionals use for their campaigns in Europe. For sure, nobody is going to give us one as part of a sponsorship package.

The pros need bikes that perform flawlessly for the spring classics and the grand tours. If a bike does fail due to a crash or a mechanical, there's an identical one just behind on the team car. (Have you ever stopped to figure how much money is festooned on those roof racks? It's a big chunk o' change!)

Two or 3 steps down from top-end bikes are some of the most amazing machines out there. They are super durable and designed to last for many seasons, making them a bit heavier than the "team issue" steeds. But their ride quality is probably way better than the stiffest and lightest race bikes that weigh 1 gram above the UCI weight minimum.

Components are likely to be the new Shimano Ultegra SL (outstanding, in my book) or Campy Centaur or SRAM Force. Even at this level, the stock wheelsets are probably best reserved for important events where weight, stiffness and aerodynamics truly count.

Frames are likely made from carbon fiber, but you'll also find high-zoot steel or aluminum, maybe even titanium.

I'm talking about bikes in the $2,800-$4,000 price range.

If you are hell-bent on spending 6 grand or more on your next bike, consider "dumbing down" a bit. Maybe instead you should spend $3,000-$3,500 on the complete bike with its event wheels, then do this:

    * Buy a set of strong, durable, handbuilt 32-spoke wheels suitable for the lousy, potholed roads you ride every day.
       
    * Buy 3 pairs of $150 bib shorts, which will be far more satisfying than the carbon handlebar you think you need for "shock absorption."
       
    * With what's left over, buy your sweetie a fabulous dinner and evening out.

So what's "classic" about all this? The class it takes to (metaphorically speaking) recognize that it's fine to let a Ferrari sit in the garage while you drive a Corolla day in and day out. That's the common sense thing to do, and the bottom line is that you actually enjoy using appropriate technology for 99% of your life.

I believe your bike should fit that 99% rule. No fuss, no muss and more time to ride because you won't need to work overtime to pay for a superbike like the one being raced on by [insert name of favorite pro]. Even so, you can still throw your hands as high as that guy when you win (imaginary) sprints.

My motto:  "Just because you can afford it, doesn't mean you have to buy it."